By Ben Spielberg
This is, to date, my favorite topic I’ve seen go viral. #FirstWorldPains is great because it is a snarky acknowledgement of privilege and inferred gratitude. It is perhaps the greatest “both/and” in history; while many users are interested in complaining, they imply at the same time that their content is meaningless in essence.
Who is @JustMissLucy and why doesn’t she use an alarm clock? Perhaps she has done a meticulous cost-benefit analysis, only to conclude that sleeping in outweighs the benefits of an extra side of preformed hash browns. @JustMissLucy did realize that, as good as sleeping in may be, tweeting about her desires is even more necessary. We salute you, @JustMissLucy. You hit the nail on the head—in third world countries, there are no breakfast specials.
Poor, poor @JoyJibberish. Doesn’t her father know that only starving African children use Picasa?
@DanielleLittler is in the midst of a predicament we all cope with on a daily basis—cell phone batteries. Usually, we set up a negative synchronization pattern, charging the iPhone while using the iPad and vice versa. However, we know that sometimes we have to deal with life on life’s terms and use both the iPod and iPad at the same time! If only Lithium batteries could charge via fear instead of electricity.
@chasejaffe, I don’t think you did that right.
#FirstWorldPains is a tag that brings us together by parting us. Never has a social caste system been more entertaining, enlightening, and fun. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to walk to the bank because the ATMs are out of service #firstworldpains